Communicate respect for the individual.

Overcoming the ‘power structure’ of the relationship isn’t easy; it requires that you act as a compassionate and knowledgeable consultant, while respecting his/her freedom of choice and self-direction. Asking permission to share your concerns is a good way to demonstrate respect.

Express empathy.

Use reflective listening to help show that you understand, reflecting what you hear them saying in your own words and checking to confirm that you heard them correctly. Identify the emotions they are expressing such as embarrassment, sadness, anger or worries and normalize those emotions as difficult.

Help them see the difference between where they are and where they want to be.

You may need to help them compare the consequences of change versus maintaining the status quo.